Ideas to help you push past your fears
As I have been on my healing journey, I have seen the generational cycles in my family and can pinpoint where my fear stemmed from, even before my sexual abuse. I noticed my family runs on fear. Most decisions are based on fear. My family refuses to go out of their comfort zone in fear of the worst happening. Even if it doesn’t make logical sense.
I do not consider myself to be a risk taker but looking back at all the big risks I took, I suppose I am. I was 25 when I purchased my very first 2 bedroom condo in a wonderful neighborhood on the North side of Chicago. When I was 29, I purchased my second condo and became a landlord. At 32, I purchased my third property which is a beautiful small home on the south side of Chicago.
When I was thinking about becoming a landlord, certain people would tell me, “what if the toilet breaks? You don’t know how to fix toilets!” Or “what if they stop paying you rent, what will you do? I don’t know Jen, it seems risky.” But being the rebel that I am, I didn’t listen and went for it. See, their behavior was fear-based. Not taking the risk because of “what could” happen.
Guess what? The toilets have in fact broken. And I pick up the phone and call a plumber. Wa-lah! Problem solved! I also have not ever had a tenant stop paying rent either. Imagine if I had given into their fear? I wouldn’t have gotten into real estate and love it!
I sold my first condo at the end of 2021 and I decided to live off that money while I started &Rise. I still had people in my life telling me I was crazy for quitting my full-time job to pursue this nonprofit. “What will you do about health insurance?” “How will you pay your bills?”
I again didn’t let their fear deter me from pursuing something bigger than myself. Deep down, I had something burning inside. A wonderful passion with a deep desire for something bigger and better than I have ever known. I didn’t know if I would be successful or not but I knew it’s a risk I was willing to take on myself.
I knew that all the bad things I had been through in my life were for a reason. Today, I can tell you that I do not regret anything I have done. All the good, the bad, and the ugly has made me who I am today. Remember that everything you have been through has a bigger purpose as well. As humans, we seek advice and validation from those we care about. Their opinions matter. However, don’t let their advice deter you from the things your heart desires.
No one knows the desires of your heart as you do. Also, do not allow THEIR fears to deter your excitement and plan to move forward with your dreams. I share this because imagine if I had listened to the naysayers. I wouldn’t have accomplished all the wonderful things in my life that bring me so much joy and contentment. Follow yours too. And if you have no one to cheer for you, I will be your cheerleader. Send me a note and I will encourage you. Sometimes we need that one person to believe in us to give us the gas we need to get going. My person was an old boss who simply believed in me and encouraged me to go back to college. I did and here I am today and it’s because he was the only person who saw my potential and believed in me. I believe in you too. Don’t give up. Keep pushing, even if it’s hard. It’s worth it.
Written by: Jennifer Ramirez
&Rise Founder
